Not Quite a Gift, Yet

A few days ago I was having a conversation with a coaching friend of mine and she was talking about her take-a-ways from this COVID- 19 situation. While I recognize there is incredible hardship in all of this, I also know that if we can look beyond our fears. There are incredible gifts available as well.

As we were talking, I shared I was learning some things about myself. As a good introvert, I am super comfortable with working remotely and I have discovered a new goal in wanting to create a stronger remote clientele. I love working with people in person, but my goal is to be able to work from anywhere, so I can help people anywhere and not have geography be an obstacle in healing.

“So, it sounds like a gift!” she said with her usual incredible enthusiasm.I paused. And, immediately going inside myself for a conversation among the parts of my mind. The dialogue went something like this:

“Is it a gift?”

“I’m not sure. I haven’t gotten there yet so it could be a gift, or it could be a curse if I don’t get there. Hard to tell.”

“Yes, but seeing it as a gift will create inspiration and motivation and increase our chances of getting there.”

“Yes, but I don’t really see it as a gift until after I’ve accomplished it, after all a gift is a treat you receive that feels wonderful. It doesn’t feel wonderful yet.”

“Well, that doesn’t make any sense at all!”

“That may be true but it’s still how I look at it”

And so on, and so forth. This all took about 10 seconds.

The end result – not sure.

Is a gift something we receive by seeing things in a new light in their place of possibility? Or, is it a gift when we’ve accomplished what the original desire inspired us to achieve or pursue?

When exactly does a gift of circumstance become a gift?

A number of years ago a good friend of mine lost his job during a company downsizing. He was devastated. He has worked for said company since before he graduated from high school and he was in his late 30’s when he lost his job. This same person had always had a dream of running his own business and had tried starting it up as a side line while still employed. It never worked as his work required 40-50 hours a week and his side line needed another full-time commitment as it was kind of an all-or nothing endeavor.

There he was, almost 40 years old – wife, kids, a mortgage, and no job. With limited education he wasn’t really hirable at the wage he had been getting, so starting over in a company didn’t look very promising. He went for it. He started his own business!

An old boyfriend of mine used to say, “don’t half ass it, it’s all ass or nothing” and my guy friend did just that. He went in all ass.

Today, about 15 years later, he owns and runs a very successful business that he and his wife built together, getting up everyday and doing what he loves.

At the time he was fired…not a gift. Or, was it?

Fifteen years later, the firing was an absolute gift. He never would’ve quit a secure job with so much responsibility at home. Now, he and his wife together built a strong business, and his kids grew up learning the value of working hard at what you love as the keys to success. All a gift.

Still, it begs the question; when did it become a gift? Was it when he got fired, or when he became successful doing what he loves? Is it a gift to me to see more clearly what I want for myself, or is the clarity a gift when I accomplish what the clarity leads me to do?

I am super curious about this, and believe me, my brain will entertain itself with this debate for quite some time. It loves this sort of thing.

In addition, I’m super curious how others see this. When does a situation become a gift? I’m open to discussion!

Blessings Galore, Anne

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