A while back I was working remotely with a client, which with a global pandemic has become a regular thing. In the midst of her session we were visited by an amazing Spiritual being. He came in Angel form and referred to himself as, what sounded to me like “Chamual” as in Samual but with a “cha”. I was not familiar with this energy, but was absolutely blown away by his beauty, strength, and the absolute peace surrounding him. Dark skin and dazzling eyes lit up my inner mind space.
He spoke of freedom.
My client and I were having a conversation about forgiveness. She had been struggling for years with a situation that left her feeling heavy with resentment. Decades after the initial incident, she was still angry with the person in the situation who never said they were sorry or ever showed remorse of any kind. Quite the opposite. It seemed that this person would go out of their way to make her look bad to others. While it totally makes sense she would feel angry and hurt, the hurt and anger were hurting her. Her health had been an ongoing issue for several years and the doctors volleyed back and forth with different diagnoses, none of which really fit her, or changed her day to day experience of life. She felt sick in some way, all the time, everyday. As we worked our way through the issue, working with her energy body, more and more came to the surface. More hurt, more situations, more life experience with the same patterns. Her Guided spoke to her about finding peace and the gifts of letting go, but she just couldn’t quite let herself let go – Until Chamual.
Chamual spoke about forgiveness as the first step, and understanding as the second. So often we seek to understand something, or someone so that we can forgive. The Angel had us reverse those. “Forgiveness comes first, understanding comes second” he said. “You look to understand so you can forgive, but you must first forgive to understand”. “Forgiveness gives you freedom, and freedom gives you objectivity, objectivity gives you understanding. You must leave your place of fear in order to see the world from another’s place of fear.” He went on, “Fear gives you blinders, you can only see the tunnel. You can only see your side and your fear and hurt. You hang on, because you’re afraid to let go of the old emotions. Forgiveness gives you the freedom to see all things, all sides all perspectives. Your vision is only limited by your ability to release the old emotions and allow yourself to expand in perspective. From there, you can understand the hurt of another.”
My client and I had a conversation about forgiveness and how it did not mean she was saying what happened to her way ok. It did not mean that she was a push over, or was giving up on herself. Forgiveness meant she could lessen her own burden, her own hurt and she began to understand that what she was waiting for was not the apology she knew would never come, she was wanting to understand why she felt somehow it was all her fault. That she clung to the old emotions so while she was trying to stop blaming herself, she could remember to blame the other person. She came to recognize she was holding herself hostage in not letting go While it frustrated her for years that the other person wasn’t suffering, and she believed she was doing all the suffering in the confusion of the old emotion, in that moment she came to see the other person was suffering through their entire life. She had never seen or known them to be happy, healthy or in a good place in life, and she was blessed beyond measure in so many ways, and all she had to do was let go of this one thing. In that moment, one thing seemed smaller than it had ever been before, and she knew she could let it go. And so, she did.
I spoke with her just a few days ago. I directed her to do some letter writing and a burn ritual after our last session, which she had done. She told me about the feeling of letting go, of burning the old story and releasing those old yucky emotions. She talked about how good she had been feeling, and how much better her inner self talk has been and how even her partner noticed something has changed.
She realized she had an ability to heal that the other person in this story didn’t have. She recognized she had the most incredible unlimited freedom within her, and she just needed to recognize it so she could use it.
Now, I’d love to say she has completely healed herself physically, but when we spoke a few days ago this wasn’t true. She was feeling better than she had in years, and that’s something right there! The gift is that now she has the green light to heal herself, to allow healing to move through her, and that she herself holds the key to what comes next.
Now this is freedom.