I was so shocked by the story that I had to share it so as soon as I got out of the Co-op, I texted my friend.
“I have a new Spirit animal and her name is Shirley,” is how I started the text. In my mind I was imagining my friend reading this with her nose and forehead crinkled up in confusion.
On this particular sunny day I was standing in line at the Co-op and started chatting with the woman checking out… of course I did. We talked about the glory of the sunshine, the spring and then, and how icy the winter had been. She launched into this story (to myself and the teller) about her friend Shirley, who had slipped on the ice this winter and was frozen to the ground for 4 hours before the fire department got her thawed and freed from the ground… read that again. SHE WAS FROZEN TO THE GROUND FOR FOUR HOURS!!! HAD TO BE FREED BY THE FIRE DEPARTMENT!!! SHE. ALMOST. DIED!!!
Shirley is 81 years old, she suffered a broken shoulder and 2 broken ribs and apparently has a great attitude as when it was over said, “Oh well. That’s life. Carry on”.
Shirley is my new power animal.
Shirley is my reminder that we can do hard things. We can experience hardship without the experience of suffering from it. Note the difference; experience is experience. What happens, what we feel, what we notice, what we have to do in response to it, all of those things are part of the experience. Suffering is when we use those hard things to say that “we are” the hardship, that somehow our worth and deservingness (or in this case lack of) is tied to hardship. We connect to it as our thinghood and then we suffer, we are in pain on some level, because we have accepted that hardness, as US. So, the experience becomes permanent = life is hard. Why does this stuff always happen to me???? And so on.
Shirley reminds me that help is always on its way even if we have to wait awhile. Life is always unfolding and friends, I get tired and cranky sometimes waiting to see how things are going to turn out, or feeling like my efforts are in vain, but I have never been frozen to the ground for 4 hours, hoping someone finds me and helps me. Shirley reminds me to stay connected to being alive and the mystery of what comes with that. Shirley reminds me to have hope, even when I feel like I am frozen to the ground in the dead of winter.
“That’s life.” It wasn’t personal, it just happened. Sometimes I indeed need to be reminded that life isn’t personal. No one and nothing is out to get me, is purposely causing me hardship or burden or stifling me, or any of the other things that can run amuck in my mind. It simply is not true. Just as the cold and ice didn’t go after Shirley, life can hand us things that, while they leave a mark, are not personal.
“Pray for Shirley,” the final words of the woman telling the story in the Coop on her way out the door. In my outside voice I said, “absolutely!” and I have. In my inside voice I thought that Shirley should probably be praying for me. She has gained wisdom and perspective that I still struggle with. She is a beacon of Light to follow, an inspiration to me, to the teller at the check out lane and I hope to everyone who reads this story.
Shirley is my new Spirit animal.
Carry on.
Forever the journey, Anne